Eye of the Storm

South Texas is extremely dry this summer.  Like dangerously dry.  For months people in this area have been praying for rain.  Our Governor even had an official day of prayer for rain a little while back.  A couple of nights ago the first measurable rain that we've had in months came through with a bang.  In the middle of the night.  While we were all sleeping.  With massive claps of thunder, bright flashes of lightening, hail, high winds and heavy rain.

As I laid in bed, startled awake by the intensity of the storm, I caught myself thinking, "Thank you, God, for this rain, but did it have to be such a loud storm?" I quickly felt convicted for not just being thankful for the benefit of the rain.  And then it happened.  That still small voice, a little after midnight, decided I needed to learn a lesson.

In life, we face storms.  The rain itself is always cleansing, refreshing, life giving.  But the storm...not so much.  The storm can be so destructive and damaging.  The storm rocks our world and rages on to a point that we can't see the benefit of the rain.  We can so easily lose sight of the fact that our storm, as all storms do, will come to an end.  And when the storm is over, the benefit of the rain can finally be measured.  But the storm is where God works.

It's in the storm that we have the chance to let God do His divine thing.  The natural thing to try to do is work in our flesh to stop the storm in any way possible.  When the reality is, our flesh has no power over this storm.  Our power over the storm comes when we finally accept that we have no control.  We have no power.  But we know the One who does.  Our power over the storm begins the second we acknowledge that running to Jesus is the only way the storm will ever end.  And it's the only way to find peace until the storm passes.

I like Mark's account of Jesus calming the raging sea.  In chapter 34, verses 35-41, he tells of how Jesus & the disciples are on the Sea of Galilee when a sudden, raging storm came upon them.  As Jesus lay sleeping in the stern of the boat, the disciples panicked.  They tried everything on their own to steady the ship and stay afloat.  But they were going down.  At some point the disciples finally decided to wake Jesus.  Isn't that a little bit like us? It's not our first reaction to go to Jesus.  We try on our own first, and after we fail miserably to calm our own storm, we run to Jesus.

I think it's interesting that Jesus slept through the storm.  It didn't disturb Him.  He knew who was in control.  He had no need to wake up because of the storm.  He didn't wake up or intervene until he was asked.  Jesus didn't sleep through the disciples pleas for help.  The cry out for help is what moved Jesus to action.  The crying out for help is what Jesus responded to when he commanded the wind and the waves to subside.  And they did.  Mark says that the wind ran out of breath and the sea became as smooth as glass.

The faith of the disciples grew that day.  Their knowledge of who Jesus really is grew that day.  Their understanding of what the power of Jesus can and wants to do grew that day.  Their boldness to share Jesus grew that day.

If there had never been a storm, Jesus would never have had the opportunity to calm it.  Jesus would have never had the opportunity to speak peace to his disciples in the midst of it.  As you walk through your storm, know that Jesus desires peace for you.  But peace can only come when you recognize your inability and ask Him to act in his ability.  The storm may not calm the second you release control and cry out to Jesus, but your soul will.  Jesus will speak the words that he spoke to the storm and his disciples that day.  "Peace!  Be still!"

It's Complicated - A Facebook Status for Father's Day

As I browsed through Facebook status updates today, Father's Day, I came across a friend's status that I think a lot of us can relate to on this day.  It said, "If Father's Day had to have a Facebook relationship status, mine would definitely be "it's complicated"."

I laughed to myself because, for me, it was a statement that could have been my status for the day.  It could be better, it has been worse...it's just complicated.  What would your status be? Single - you've never had an active father in your life? Divorced - there once was relationship, but now it's severed? In a relationship - things with your dad are good and as they should be?

I think far too many fall in one of the categories where the relationship isn't good, or at least as good as it should be.  When I was younger, Father's Day was a day that I really struggled with.  I would find myself envious of what other people had with their fathers.  I even resented the day.  As I've grown older, and hopefully a little wiser, I've come to realize that good, bad or ugly, my relationship and my experiences with my father have shaped me.  Some of those "shapes" haven't always been too pretty.  And I've had to learn my own lessons from them.

But my Father allows me to take those good, bad & ugly experiences and grow from them.  Learn from them.  Teach from them.  My Father takes what the enemy would love to have used to destroy me, to make me a better mother, a better wife, a better friend.  My Father reminds me that He will never leave or forsake me.  My Father will never let me down.

If you are one of those that is "in a relationship" with your earthly father, count your blessings.  If you are one, like me, who has another "status" with your earthly Father, rest assured, your Heavenly Father seeks to be all of the things and more that you lack in an earthly father.  He seeks to be a Father to the orphaned.  And when he promises to never leave, never cause you pain, never abandon you, He means it.

Psalm 68:5 - Father of orphans, champion of widows, is God in his holy house.

The Disconnect

Have you ever grown so tired that you just have a total disconnect? Not just an I'm-so-sleepy kind of tired, but a complete and total physical, spiritual & emotional tired that is almost painful? On Sunday, I heard a fact about the Psalmist David that I had never heard.  David had about an 18 month period where he grew weary of fighting God's battle.  He decided to make his own way and disconnect from God's work.  He didn't pray, he didn't write.  In fact, for 18 months we had no Psalms from King David.

His disconnect from fighting God's battle didn't stop him from having to fight.  It just became his fight.  At the end of it, he returned home with his men to find his village destroyed and wives & children gone.  Then he cried out to God.

How often have we been there? Maybe it hasn't been a year and a half since we've reached out to God, but it's been a long time since we've really connected with Him, really been intimate with Him.  Or maybe it really has been that long period of time that there's been no communication.

It struck me that David was weary, so he gave up the fight.  But his fight continued.  Just without God.  So often we grow weary.  The path that God has placed before us seems impassable.  The road we're going down has more ups & downs that an amusement park roller coaster.  The journey we're on seems to be through a never ending wilderness.  And we just want to quit.  Disconnect.  Give up.  Walk away.  Stop fighting.  But when we do, we may find rest for a short time, but the fight always continues.

David is someone I so often feel I relate to.  Maybe one of the most "human" of all of the Bible heroes we know about.  He failed often, felt short of the glory, but always returned to his God.  David disconnected in a time of weariness and exhaustion.  And fought a long battle that was likely made more difficult because he had no connection to God in that time.  But he came back.  He reconnected.  And God restored all that was lost plus some.

Are you in a place of disconnect right now? Maybe you've grown weary of the battle that you've been fighting.  You've grown discouraged by the path God is leading you down.  All you want to do right now is quit.  Throw in the towel.  Disconnect.  God wants you to know that sees your battle.  He knows your path has been troubled.  God knows you're weary.  But what he wants most of all right now is for you to connect deeper.  Press in more.  And know that He is God.

I Can Do It By Myself

To say that this day was a challenging day in motherhood is a gross understatement!  I found myself seemingly constantly redirecting & disciplining my 3 year old.  As I sat tonight, completely exhausted from the parenting battles of the day, and watched her attempt to put her pajamas on herself, God taught me a lesson.

She fought and struggled to get her shirt on by herself.  Any offer of help was quickly and animately refused.  Direction and instruction were completely disregarded.  After quite a while of struggle & frustration, she finally got her now-very-stretched-out shirt on.  All the while insisting, "I can do it by my self!"

As I sat trying to convince her that if she'd simply listen to me, this process would be much easier and less frustrating, that still small voice spoke.  You know the one.  It interrupts the pity party of your day and steps on your spiritual toes a bit.

I suddenly got a glimpse of what God must feel like dealing with me and my stubbornness and independence.  I sit and try to do things myself, my way.  All the while, God is giving direction and instruction that I'm just not listening to.  I hear it, just like my daughter did tonight, but I'm not listening.  All the while, God sits patiently by, knowing that I'll probably get my proverbial shirt on, but when I do I'll be exhausted, frustrated and it'll probably be stretched a size bigger.  But if I had simply listened, the process would have been easier, smoother.  And I'd maybe enjoy the outcome a little more!

Proverbs 13:1 says "Intelligent children listen to their parents; foolish children do their own thing."  Today that sounds a little different to me.  Yes, I want my children to listen to me.  But today I hear it as my Heavenly Father talking to His daughter, telling me to listen!  And don't try to do it by my self!