Here's a secret. I don't do "still" very well. "Still" means that the to-do list isn't being checked off; "still" means that the kids are unattended; "still" means that I'm not catching up on this, that or the other. "Still", to me, way too often means that things are being left undone that need to be done. So I don't do "still" very well.
You know how you hear about that "still, small voice"? (There's that "still" word again.) Well, I'm convinced now that the Holy Spirit is the "still, small voice" until God himself has to yell.
Lately I feel like we've been much busier than usual. There's been a lot more going on, more commitments to tend to, more to get prepared for, so "still" has not been the highest on my priority list. All the while, I've felt myself falling into a funk that I convinced myself I could sleep myself out of. But catching up on sleep didn't move the funk.
See, the "still, small voice" has been nudging me to be "still" for a week or so now, but I kept telling it that I would when stuff slowed down. Today, as I sat across from my favorite Christmas wall hanging (wishing I was in the snow like the big tree in my picture is), I stared at it as calm and peace began to come over me. Then I looked toward the bottom. And God yelled.
God yelled at me. He interrupted my quiet, calm peace and yelled. The scripture at the bottom of my favorite Christmas wall hanging says "Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10". As my eyes hit the scripture I didn't "read" it. I literally felt that God yelled the words to me. "Be still!" And it hit me. My funk has been totally self inflicted. The Holy Spirit has been trying to sweetly and gently whisper that to me for a week or so now. But since I wouldn't listen to his "sweetness", my Daddy upstairs had to pull out the "Dad" voice and yell at me.
As I sat still for the first time in way too long - tuning out everything around me, not worrying about unloading the dishwasher, not focusing on getting work done for church, ignoring the laundry - my funk melted away. God reminded me that amidst all of the crazy, busy stuff in life, He's in control. He knows right where I am and exactly what I need. And He loves me way too much to let me go on any longer in my funk, so He raised His "Daddy" voice to lovingly get my attention and remind me to be still.
Today, and every day, make time (even when you're exhausted, the laundry has piled up, the kids have planned a mutiny, dinner barely qualified as edible and the to-do list is taller than you) to be still. In the short time that you allow yourself to be still, God will restore more than even the most perfect, Starbucks filled day can give to you. I'm so glad I was still today.
1 comment:
Very Good sister Beth!!!
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